When you know your own Myers-Briggs type, it is eye opening. There are so many things you can do with the knowledge; figuring out your stressors, figuring out your career; or even using it to navigate a challenging situation. But when you know the MBTI of the people around you, in your life and in your relationships, you hold the key to peaceful communication with others; complete understanding and knowledge of others; how others act, and why the act the way they do.
Once you are able to understand and identify others types – some examples are: your parents; your siblings; your significant other; your friends; your co-workers, you can really make a difference, especially in a challenging relationship that you cannot choose (i.e. parents, siblings or coworkers). Each preference type has a different way of processing the world; through decision making; through processing information; through planning out their life; through identifying the world and others, and the only way to understand why someone does something the way they do it, is to know their MBTI.
Let’s start with a simple example, as this is a very common one that plays out in all types of relationships. The 4th letter in the series is either people with a preference for judging, or a preference for perceiving. Those with a preference for judging prefer to get things done in advance of a deadline. They like to have the project done, so that they have time to make tweaks, change things as needed, or just be done with it and know it’s turned in and checked off their to-do list. People with a preference for judging can experience anxiety if they don’t get the task done in advance, thinking that they may likely miss the deadline, or be too pressured to complete it in a short amount of time that they won’t give the project the time it deserves. They also like to check off tasks because they want to save money, for example, they will go ahead and cancel that subscription, so they aren’t surprised by the charge on their card the following month.
People with a perceiving preference are the opposite. They enjoy the pressure the deadline gives them, and often won’t start on the project until just enough time prior to the deadline to complete the project. They tend to think about the project, and think of ideas for it prior to, and just up until, starting the project, but they don’t actually start it until they have just enough time to do so. In the instance that they don’t budget enough time for it, they are comfortable negotiating an extension of the deadline, or in some cases anxiety is caused for these types if they are nervous to ask for an extension, and then they can feel as though they have let someone down (the reaction and response to this goes into the other letter preferences). In the example of the subscription cancellation, they will likely wait until the day before to cancel it, so that they can get the most benefit out of the subscription, even if that means running the risk that they forget to cancel it and are charged again.
Anyway, you can see how this can play out at work, or in a romantic relationship. If you manage someone at work, and you have a preference for judging, and they have a preference for perceiving, you may have to have an upfront expectation conversation with them, because otherwise, they are not likely to understand why you want the project completed in advance of the deadline, and feel as though you are micromanaging them. The opposite can happen as well, where if the manager were someone with a perceiving preference, they can judge the person working for them, wondering why they act so quickly, and wondering why they cause themselves stress when they had additional time to complete the project. I see this in play out every day in all of my relationships, and I try to help people to understand where I, and others, are coming from. This was an incredibly small example, but can you imagine if everyone knew and followed MBTI and understood others personality types? We might actually be able to achieve world peace!
I’d love to hear what you think! Email me and let’s start a conversation.
Link to MBTI Training Institute: https://mbtitraininginstitute.myersbriggs.org/
Email me: firstname.lastname@example.org
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