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Personality Type Consultation

Hi everyone! I am now a MBTI® certified practitioner! If you have taken the paid test, or a free test before and are interested in learning more, I am your girl 🙂

My fee is $200 per session, and I will learn more about you and ask questions to get to your preferred personality type. We will work through each set of personality type letters, and determine your best fit type. Feel free to reach out to me with questions as well. Here are some of the reasons why you may want to know your preferred type:

» Great for determining your best fit career, or finding a new career if your current career doesn’t fit

» Great for finding common ground with others and understanding where they may be coming from

» Dig in to determine why you answered the questions the way you did, and determine if this is really your best fit type

» It’s essential for wellness and self care. To determine what you need to be your best self, you must first understand yourself

There are multiple other reasons to find out your preferred type and I am here to help!

Email me for questions, or to set up your session.

Happy Sunday!

Teal

Boundaries

I’ve learned a lot about boundaries in the last year. I think it’s important to write about them because not many people truly know what they are. Some people put up a wall, and decide that’s their boundary. Some people make impossible rules for their family members and close friends to follow. Some people yell and scream when someone else makes a mistake and call it a boundary. I am not saying all this to point a finger at anyone. I’ve just been observing for most of my life, and realized that most people, despite all the “boundary setting” self-care jargon that goes around, have absolutely no idea how set a meaningful and realistic boundary. Myself included, at least up until this point. 

Boundaries come from a place of deep love. Yes, they come from self-care, but they actually come from deep love of the other person/people as well. When we set boundaries, it is a realistic expectation, and it comes from a realistic state of being. For example, if I get tired after three hours of socializing, setting the boundary can be lovingly telling the person I am with that I must go home after three hours. Otherwise, I will be drained of all my energy. I will be tired the next day, and I will be resentful of them if I don’t let them know how I feel. Others aren’t mind-readers, and most others want you to be happy because they love you. If they don’t want you to be happy, then the relationship is worth re-thinking. I am by no means telling people to start cutting off relationships, but maybe take a look at where the disconnect lies. And yes, this requires a lot of self-reflection and self-inquiry, but it is worth it when you are able to find an energetic balance in life that works well for you. 

My more recent realization is that when setting a boundary, you are setting this boundary out of a love and consideration for the other person. If you are expecting them to read your mind, and then becoming resentful of them because they didn’t, you are the one not being considerate of them. This was hard for me to swallow (and still is) because I think of myself as a truly conscientious person, but I hate creating conflict. Setting boundaries is hard for me. But if I want to truly care for someone else, I must tell them when I am being pushed too hard. Easier said than done, and I am by no means an expert, or even close to being good at this yet. I think success and ease come over time and with practice, and I am just starting at the beginning. 

I hope this helps someone out there struggling with what boundaries mean to them. I am happy to have a dialogue if anyone has questions or wants to talk about it further. 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Living in the Past or Future

I’ve been doing A Course in Miracles, and started in on lesson eight today. Most of these concepts are ones I already apply to most of my thoughts and everyday life, but they are great reminders to pay attention to that pesky narrative that your thinking mind tries to impose on you. Today’s lesson is to think about how your thoughts are actually past thoughts. What I am interpreting the book to mean is that everything your thinking mind can think of, is something you have already seen, done, or created a neural pathway for in your brain for. You can project the future (or I like to call it “future project”), but the projection will be limited to anything you have already known in the past because you can’t predict something you have never experienced before. 

As an INFJ, and using introverted intuition as my hero function, I naturally future project, so this lesson really resonates with me. It’s a great reminder to be here now, in the present, and the lesson mentions that this means that your mind should be a blank slate when you are actually in the present. If you are fully living in the present, you cannot be truly thinking of anything else. Additionally, the past isn’t the current moment and when thinking about the past, you aren’t actually visually seeing the past. So, what you are thinking about doesn’t currently exist. Therefore, the only way to live is in the present. 

Let me know what you think! Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Introversion versus Shyness

In our society, the word “shy” seems to be the go-to word for anyone who seems quiet. People notice those who don’t speak much, and instantly label them shy. However, there is a big difference in the meaning of shy and introversion. Additionally, social anxiety tends to go along with shyness, not necessarily introversion. 

Shyness comes from a fear of speaking or being judged. Shyness goes hand in hand with social anxiety, or they might just be the external and internal expressions of the same thing, respectively. Being shy comes from an actual fear and physical reaction to being the center of attention, and fear of speaking out loud. A person who experiences social anxiety may experience physical symptoms of being shy; they may get sweaty, have a racing heart or feel nauseous when in social situations. Extroverts as well as introverts can each have social anxiety or shyness. It is not limited to type preference.  

Introversion is a type preference in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. It means that someone prefers to recharge by themselves, or at least in a relaxing environment where they can do their own thing. They also process things slowly, and tend to think before responding to external stimuli or making a decision. Their energy is drained by consistent social interaction with no breaks or recharge time. They may prefer to stay home versus going to a party with many people they don’t know. Internally, they like to think before speaking, but this does not equate to “shyness”. Introversion does not mean that someone is afraid of speaking, it is actually literally the way that someone processes external stimuli and outwardly expresses it. 

The difference in the two is an important distinction. When we label people who don’t talk much as shy, we are assuming they have something wrong with them that needs to be treated. Introversion is NOT something to be treated. Social anxiety is, to the extent that we are attempting to help the person not feel anxious in social situations, and as long as they are open to treatment. The treatment does not necessarily need to be medication either. Treatment can include therapy, tools (such as breathing work or cognitive reframing) to help the person in social settings and/or in some cases medication. 

Let me know what you think! Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics.  Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

The Midnight Library

The Midnight Library was a fantastic read & a great reminder about what to prioritize in life. For a quick summary, the story centers around Nora, a woman in her 30’s who feels dejected by most of the people in her life, and feels woefully inadequate and isn’t sure if she has turned down several possible promising trajectories her life could have taken based on her particular hobbies and studies. At some point, she finds herself in the Midnight Library, which allows her to see what would have happened in life if she had followed those other paths, and even some more mundane choices she could have made. I believe that the book’s goal is to point out to us that we can question “what if I had done it this way?” for the rest of our lives, but if we aren’t content to live in the present moment, and create and nurture our most important relationships, life isn’t worth living. 

Anyway, the story was interesting and engaging and certainly worth the read. For me, it served as a reminder to reach out to those who I hadn’t spoken to in a while, show my deep appreciation for those I love and that care for me, and also a reminder to really put in the effort to understand where someone else is coming from instead of allowing myself to just react to their actions. And the biggest one of all, it reminded me to SPEAK UP when I am uncomfortable, or unhappy with the way someone is treating me. A lot of times the other person just doesn’t know they are doing it, and the relationship suffers because I am unhappy and haven’t said anything.  

Another common theme is to be kind to yourself. There may be circumstances you can’t control, but it doesn’t mean you are a bad person. I thought the book had a lot of positive messages, even if the undercurrent was a bit dark (TW: it does contain suicide). 

Check it out if you are interested!

Email me if you have any questions: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Wonder

Wonder is a theme word that has come up for me lately. It is such a joyous word, and I want to try and remember to create and approach new and old situations with a sense of wonder. This creates a sense of open-ness and expansion in the mind, instead of constriction. It opens your mind up to new possibilities, allowing it to be creative with new solutions and new ways of looking at the same problem. 

For a very basic start, when a problem comes up, try asking yourself: 

  • I wonder what would happen if I approached this from a new perspective? 
  • I wonder if I could try to see where the other person is coming from? 
  • I wonder whether there are more solutions to the problem than I am currently seeing? 

It’s not even necessary to know all the answers, but just creating that curiosity will create joy and expansion from the inside-out. 

Another way to create wonder is to notice the world through a lens of wonder. For example, I have started taking daily walks through my neighborhood, and I notice all the different types of flowers blooming in people’s yards. I stop and take pictures of most of them. Now I anticipate my daily walks because of the sense of wonder that has been created around seeing a new flower; a new color, a new type of flower, a new bee or animal near the flowers.  

A sense of wonder helps to calibrate your energy to a higher level, where wonders never cease! 

Let me know if this resonates with you, or if you have other ideas on how to create a sense of wonder in your life. Email me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Intuition versus Sensing

The most confusion in the Myers Briggs typing indicator, is typically the second letter of the four-letter types, N or S; intuition or sensing. A lot of times people use both, and are unsure which they use more of, and more often than not, I have found that this letter preference is hardest for opposite types to be accepting of, and accommodating of. 

To explain intuition, as an extreme example, think about the people who are always questioning the meaning of life. They live in the intangible world of theory and the abstract. To explain sensing, as again an extreme example, think of the person who lives in the five senses. When they are driving a car, for example, they are part of the car, they feel the car, they hear the car, they see how it looks and memorize what color it is. They live in the tangible world. 

Here is a list of words I came up with to show the opposition of the processing of each type intuition versus sensing, respectively; intangible versus tangible, mind versus body, 6th sense versus 5 senses, conceptual/abstract versus concrete, future oriented versus past & present oriented, searches for a deeper meaning versus focuses on current experience, big-picture versus specific.

Let me know if any of this resonates with you, and if you are still struggling with whether you take in information through intuition or through sensing. I’d love to know your thoughts and if this helped to clarify it for you or not! 

I’d love to hear what you have to say!  Email me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com 

Website

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Impatience

The topic of impatience has come up a lot for me lately, and not to mention, it was a recent topic in Lauren Sapala’s most recent class called The Joyful Writer. I never thought of myself as an impatient person, in fact, I had been complimented on my extreme patience and low maintenance in the past. But I recently realized that while I have patience for other people, I do not have patience with myself. In fact, I was so caught up in being impatient with myself and feeling like I was running out of time all the time, that was what was causing issues in my closest relationships. 

I treat time like a commodity that there isn’t enough of. Like I will never have enough time to complete all the things I want to complete in this life, I will never be able to read all the books I want to read, meet all the people I want to meet. So instead of going slowly and being in the present moment, I was constantly living in the future, trying to blow through everything I felt that I had to do so that I didn’t miss out on anything. I was setting myself schedules that I was adhering to very strictly, and it didn’t help that I have about eight-ten meetings per day for work, causing me to stress that I wouldn’t make it to each one of them if I didn’t keep a close eye on the time. 

Another part of impatience with myself is perfectionism, and asking myself why I can’t just get things done faster that are perfect? When I am going slowly with something, and it isn’t turning out the way I want it to, that’s another aspect to impatience. 

Does anyone else experience this, and if so, what is your experience with it? Are there other things that you recognize as impatience with yourself? I recently went on vacation in Mexico for eight days, and my brain & body forced me to relax. I opened up my computer and the words on the screen actually appeared fuzzy, and my head felt like it was in a fog. I took eight glorious days and spent each present moment with my partner. I didn’t do any work, or anything that I felt like had to be perfect. It was the ultimate reset, and I haven’t gone back to my impatient ways just yet. However, I do feel lazy, and my current goal is to find the right balance between doing and resting. 

Write to me and let me know if you experience impatience with yourself! I’d love to hear what you have to say & start a discussion about it: infinitetealskies@gmail.com 

My website is: www.infinitetealskies.com 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test: http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

J or P – The 4th Letter in the Myers-Briggs Personality Type

I took a class on the opposite J and P preferences this past weekend, which is the 4th letter that makes up a Myers-Briggs 4 letter type. I’ve always known the main differences between the two, but it was fascinating hearing it articulated, and also hearing from sets of people in relationships, and how each type preference deals with things within different relationships/type pairings. A very big moment of clarity/reminder for me was when it was mentioned that people with the J preference find joy in the completion of tasks or projects, but people with the P preference find joy in the processing of the project or task. My friend Beth, who is an INFP, described it as people with a P preference are uncomfortable when a project is finished, because the joy for her in doing projects actually lies in the doing of the project itself. Whereas for a person with a J preference finds the joy in the completion of the project and feels more comfortable when tasks are marked off their to do list. 

Now, the J preference and the P preference can cause contention even in the best of relationships. For example, my significant other has a P preference, and he loves the freedom to make a decision in the moment versus in advance. So, I might make a reservation for a restaurant a week in advance, but he’d prefer to see how he feels on Friday night, and go where the night takes him. I also want to make it clear that you are not “stuck” in your type either way. Sure, a person with a P preference can make a reservation, and a person with a J preference can certainly go with the flow and decide on a restaurant 15 minutes in advance. The fun for me (a J preference) lies in the planning. I enjoy planning out a vacation, finding all the local fun spots to go and reserve them in advance to make sure we get a chance to go to them. Patrick enjoys have a basic structure for a trip, but prefers to go into a situation with the option to meet a local, have them tell us a fun place to go, and then having the flexibility and the freedom to go do it in that moment, in whatever order feels good. I am less able to flex like that, and prefer to know what I am going to be doing each day, and possibly even longer in advance. I would plan a trip a year in advance, and that would be fun and satisfying for me. That typically does not satisfy the P preference. 

Now for a P and a J preference pairing in a relationship – there was some great advice given. For example, if a person with a J preference would like a decision made quickly, like what to eat for dinner or where to go, the person with the J preference can give the person with the P preference three options, and let them chose from those options. This satisfies the person with the J preference who is hungry and ready to eat now, and it also satisfies the person with a P preference, who needs to feel like they were presented with options and not pigeon-holed into one thing. If the person with the P preference can allow the person with the J preference to make more of the decisions and the plan, and just go along with the plan, this can satisfy both types. Also, vice versa, the person with the J preference can attempt to every now and again go with the flow, and do what the person with the P preference thinks is a great idea right there in the moment. 

Write to me and let me know what you want to know more about! infinitetealskies@gmail.com 

Teal’s Website

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test: Free Test

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here:  Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

INFJ/INTJ Relationships

Happy Sunday! 

In continuing with the relationship series after a brief hiatus, today I will discuss INFJ’s with INTJ’s. I am intentionally starting with INFJ (as my own type) but will expand out from there. Please let me now if there is a type pairing you are interested in, and I am happy to write a bit about it! 

Again, remember to stay tuned for you and your partner’s type! This information also applies to friendships, or familial relationships, but I am going to apply it to romantic relationships for purposes of efficiency. 

A common pairing for INFJ is INTJ. The similarities between the two types are all of the letters except the third one, the preference for thinking versus feeling. I will also explain a bit about the similarities and differences in the first two cognitive functions between the two types. Both INFJ’s and INTJ’s use introverted intuition as their first function, and INFJ’s use extroverted feeling, whereas INTJ’s use extroverted thinking as their secondary function. 

To start, let’s discuss the type preference that is opposite (thinking versus feeling): 

Those that use a feeling preference will consider relationships and the emotions of others when making a decision. Their primary decision-making factor is how that decision will affect other people. Those that use a thinking preference are usually very rational and efficient. They base their decision-making primarily on what makes the most sense based on a variety of factors, for example, timing, resources, or money. People with a thinking preference tend to be very fair in their relationships, however they will not necessarily base decisions on another person’s feelings about the decision. 

To dive into the cognitive functions, the INFJ and INTJ have the same dominant cognitive function, which is introverted intuition. This means that they both take in patterns and data and process it internally. Introverted intuition is a perceiving function, meaning it is done subconsciously. Because of this, the INFJ and INTJ may have deep insights that appear to come quite randomly. However, the brain is always processing the information or patterns that it picks up on, and when the patterns come together, it creates a big picture awareness that seems mystical to someone observing the INFJ or INTJ’s insights. When an INTJ and an INFJ come together, they will be fascinated with discussing theoretical topics and asking “what if” questions, for example, about the Universe and our fundamental existence. 

The secondary functions for each type: the INFJ’s secondary function is extroverted feeling and the INTJ’s secondary function is extroverted thinking. The secondary functions are really where an INTJ and an INFJ can differ, or feel that they process things quite differently from one another. The INFJ uses their secondary function to create harmony within groups, and to process their feelings externally. An INFJ may want to talk about their feelings, and work through them. An INTJ may indulge this, but not fully understand, as the INTJ is using extroverted thinking as their secondary cognitive function. The INFJ can feel disregarded or hurt by the INTJ’s lack of emotional response to their feelings. An INTJ using extroverted thinking, likes to take in external data and use it to understand the world. They enjoy facts and logic, and may feel that the INFJ is impractical and emotional, and not understand why the INFJ would focus so much of their decision-making process on other people and their emotions. 

INTJ’s and INFJ’s are likely to share similar interests, like philosophizing, learning about a variety of new topics, and/or some creative pursuits, like writing. There are likely to be a few hobbies that are different, as with any type pairing, and the INTJ may be more interested in science or technology, etc (more factual based topics) than an INFJ. 

The best way for these two types to get along is to really indulge the dominant cognitive function and find new and interesting topics to discuss. A big part of this is also to just ask your partner to respect, if they are unable to understand, your decision-making process, which is either the preference for thinking or feeling. 

I hope this helps some of you in an INFJ/INTJ relationship! Feel free to email if you have questions, or if there is a type pairing you’d like me to discuss next, or anything else! infinitetealskies@gmail.com 

My website is:  www.infinitetealskies.com 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test: Free Test

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here:  Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

When to Take Breaks

I took a break from writing last week to take a self-care and mental health break, but I am back now! I wanted to take this time to write a bit about taking breaks for self-care, because I think we can struggle with knowing when to take a break and when to keep plugging along. I know I struggle with it, and have heard many others who struggle with it as well. Here are some questions to find out if you are struggling with this: 

  • Do you ever feel like you are really low on energy? Or just downright tired? 
  • Do you feel like you are wading through mud, or your brain feels foggy? 
  • Do you ever think you might want to take a break, but then struggle with knowing if it is actually the best thing for you or not? 

If you answered yes to most of those, likely you are having trouble with knowing when to take a break. When I speak of taking a break, I mean changing your normal, daily routine in any way because you feel tired or burnt out. For example, skipping your daily exercise, asking for a day off from work, allowing yourself to have that donut, or in my case, taking a week’s break from blogging. I know there are people in the world who don’t follow a daily routine, and are perfectly happy doing things differently each day, but here I am specifically talking about people who feel that they do better by following a daily routine. For instance, I know that if I don’t do my morning yoga each morning for 20-40 minutes, I will suffer from more anxious thoughts and stress eating all day, which then spirals into bad habits all around. Also, please don’t feel as if you are procrastinating by taking a break. Sometimes it really is in your best interest to slow down!! 

So, if you feel you struggle with not knowing WHEN to take a mental health or self-care break, check in with your mind. There are a lot of times when I don’t want to do something, but I will plug through my daily routine anyway, and then I feel better because of it. However, when you start pushing yourself daily to get through your routine, and you start feeling tired and dragged down, it may be time for a mental health or self-care day. It doesn’t have to be drastic, but just do small things for yourself that rejuvenate you, and in that time, don’t follow your daily routine, don’t say yes to anyone and try to take the day off work, if you can. 

Here are some ideas for self-care or mental health rejuvenation: 

  • Meditation 
  • Reading 
  • Watching a light movie or show 
  • Face mask or skin care 
  • Nap 
  • Chatting with a partner or close friend 
  • A light hike in nature 
  • Learning something new that you are interested in 
  • Snuggling with a pet or partner 
  • Light, relaxing Yoga 
  • Journal (this sometimes helps me find out if I need a break in the first place)

All of these activities are wonderful ways to rejuvenate yourself and remind you why you have a daily routine in the first place. Even if you don’t have an intense routine, taking a break from the normal day to day grind is always important when it has become a bit too much or too monotonous. 

Reach out to me if you want to chat about your daily routine. Let me know if there is anything else you would like to learn/talk about! Email me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Website: www.infinitetealskies.com 

Happy Sunday! 

Love, 

Teal