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Personality Type Consultation

Hi everyone! I am now a MBTI® certified practitioner! If you have taken the paid test, or a free test before and are interested in learning more, I am your girl 🙂

My fee is $200 per session, and I will learn more about you and ask questions to get to your preferred personality type. We will work through each set of personality type letters, and determine your best fit type. Feel free to reach out to me with questions as well. Here are some of the reasons why you may want to know your preferred type:

» Great for determining your best fit career, or finding a new career if your current career doesn’t fit

» Great for finding common ground with others and understanding where they may be coming from

» Dig in to determine why you answered the questions the way you did, and determine if this is really your best fit type

» It’s essential for wellness and self care. To determine what you need to be your best self, you must first understand yourself

There are multiple other reasons to find out your preferred type and I am here to help!

Email me for questions, or to set up your session.

Happy Sunday!

Teal

How to Mitigate Stress for Each Type Based on the Inferior Functions 

There are a lot of MBTI articles out there about stress and the inferior functions. They say that living in your inferior function for too long can cause stress, and then you will be in what’s known as “grip stress”. I’d like to take it a step farther, and discuss my theory that if we play with our inferior function a bit, we can help it to mature. By no means, am saying to constantly live in your inferior function (that would definitely burn out your first two functions & cause you to be in grip stress mode), but my theory is that by bringing it forward and giving it sometime in the sun in a playful way may lead to less stress going forward. BUT this has to be a preemptive action, and not reactive or we will have already gone into stress mode. So, take a little time when the stakes aren’t high to engage your inferior function in a fun way and see if it helps! 

Extroverted Thinking (Te) – Inferior: INFP/ISFP 

INFPs & ISFPs have Extroverted Thinking (Te) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Te may overanalyze external data, trying to make sense of the world through external fact patterns. Some ways to try out using Te in a fun, non-stressful way might be learning new statistics based on external facts and data, possibly through watching the History channel, or “How It’s Made”. 

Introverted Thinking (Ti) – Inferior: ENFJ/ESFJ 

ENFJs & ESFJs have Introverted Thinking (Ti) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Ti may overanalyze fact patterns that they have internalized, trying to make sense of the world through their internal thinking principles. Some ways to try out using Ti in a fun, non-stressful way might be analyzing data and facts that they have collected over time, and determining what their principles are around those facts, possibly through studying the stock market and investing in stocks that they think are likely to be successful. 

Extroverted Intuition (Ne) – Inferior: ISFJ/ISTJ 

ISFJs & ISTJs have Extroverted Intuition (Ne) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Ne may spiral by trying to interpret situations and events and figure out the pattern or interconnectedness within those relationships even if the conclusion is inaccurate. Some ways to try out using Ne in a fun, non-stressful way might be to engage in activities that draw links in external connectedness with relationships and experiences, and relating them to other concepts possibly through having a friendly debate with someone, or joining a debate club. 

Introverted Intuition (Ni) – Inferior: ESFP/ESTP 

ESFPs & ESTPs have Introverted Intuition (Ni) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Ni may spiral by trying to take internal information and data points to create a pattern and project the future even if the conclusion is inaccurate or stressful. Some ways to try out using Ni in a fun, non-stressful way might be to engage your pattern finding side of the brain, and play around with it, possibly through playing a pattern-finding and strategic thinking board game, like Clue or Mancala. 

Extroverted Sensing (Se) – Inferior: INFJ/INTJ 

INFJs & INTJs have Extroverted Sensing (Se) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Se may engage in external sensing activities in excess, like over-eating and over-exercising. Some ways to try out using Se in a fun, non-stressful way might be to engage in activities that activate their sensing function in a light, easy way, possibly through taking a walk in nature or doing some sightseeing traveling. 

Introverted Sensing (Si) – Inferior: ENFP/ENTP 

ENFPs & ENTPs have Introverted Sensing (Si) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Si may engage in placing a lot of emphasis on their past experiences and memories, and use that to make their decisions. Some ways to try out using Si in a fun, non-stressful way might be to engage in activities that activate their sensing function in a light, easy way, possibly through scrapbooking or journaling about past experiences. 

Extroverted Feeling (Fe) – Inferior: INTP/ISTP 

INTPs & ISTPs have Extroverted Feeling (Fe) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Fe may start to place too much emphasis on others perspectives, and get caught in a loop of trying to people please and not knowing how they feel about something. Some ways to try out using Fe in a fun, non-stressful way might be trying to pay attention to other people’s feelings, possibly through watching a Hallmark movie or play with letting someone else make a low-stakes decision for you, like where to eat for dinner. 

Introverted Feeling (Fi) – Inferior: ENTJ/ESTJ 

ENTJs & ESTJs have Introverted Feeling (Fi) as their inferior function. When in grip stress mode, the Fi may place too much worth on how they are feeling about something and become punitive based on their internal values. Some ways to try out using Fi in a fun, non-stressful way might be trying to take a low-stakes decision and determine how you would feel about the situation based on your values, possibly through journaling about your feelings or listening to music and paying attention to see what feelings that might evoke for you. 

Feel free to comment below if you have any thoughts! 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

What Causes Pain for Each Cognitive Function 

Each Myers-Briggs type has a dominant cognitive function that they use to process information that they take in from their external environment. Anytime they interact with someone else or the environment, they receive information and process it through their first cognitive function. They typically also use this function to make the majority of their decisions, along with some help from the auxiliary, or secondary, function. Each MBTI type has a certain type of behavior or inputs from their environment that can cause them pain. Once each type realizes what causes them pain, they can take a look at those environmental triggers and recognize what is happening. The reason these behaviors cause pain is because the natural way of processing feels as if it is being threatened, and the person may lash out or withdraw because of the flight or fight response to the “threat”.  

Extroverted Thinking (Te) – Dominant: ENTJ/ESTJ and Auxiliary: INTJ/ISTJ 

Being undermined. Types who use Extroverted Thinking take data from the external environment and make decisions and processes based on that. They use facts and data to make their decisions quickly and logically. They typically don’t believe that other options can be considered. Being undermined can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may feel indignant. 

Introverted Thinking (Ti) – Dominant: INTP/ISTP and Auxiliary: ENTP/ESTP 

Being questioned. Types who use Introverted Thinking take data and facts from their internal environment and use these facts to assess each individual situation. They use long-term analysis in their heads to make their decisions rationally. Being questioned can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may feel angry. 

Extroverted Intuition (Ne) – Dominant: ENFP/ENTP and Auxiliary: INTP/INFP 

Having their ideas shut down. Types who use Extroverted Intuition find patterns in external data and facts and will take into account a lot of different sources. They enjoy big-picture theorizing and have a lot of creative ideas. Having their ideas shut down can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may feel invalidated. 

Introverted Intuition (Ni) – Dominant: INFJ/INTJ and Auxiliary: ENFJ/ENTJ 

Being ignored or invalidated. Types who use Introverted Intuition take patterns from the internal environment and make fairly accurate theories based on pattern recognition. They use data and internal patterns to project the future without necessarily having the facts to back up their ideas. Having their ideas ignored or invalidated can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may shut down. 

Extroverted Sensing (Se) – Dominant: ESFP/ESTP and Auxiliary: ISFP/ISTP 

Losing connection with the 5 senses. Types who use Extroverted Sensing experience and process the world based on their five senses. They are very engaged with the present moment, taking in everything through the five senses and making choices that align with those senses. Being deprived of using their 5 senses can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may get bored. 

Introverted Sensing (Si) – Dominant: ISFJ/ISTJ and Auxiliary: ESFJ/ESTJ 

Having their experiences invalidated. Types who use Introverted Sensing are very connected with their own past experiences and use an archival system of data they have collected over time through the lens of their own experience. If someone questions their choices based on their past experiences can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may feel an inner turmoil. 

Extroverted Feeling (Fe) – Dominant: ENFJ/ESF and Auxiliary: INFJ/ISFJ 

Someone being aggressively confrontational. Types who use Extroverted Feeling crave external harmony and prefer to be in an environment where everyone is getting along. They can handle conflict if it is presented in a way that takes into account everyone’s feelings and respect for each person. However, if someone is being aggressively confrontational, it can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may feel frightened. 

Introverted Feeling (Fi) – INFP/ISFP and Auxiliary: ENFP/ESFP 

Not being trusted or their advice not taken seriously. Types who use Introverted Feeling use their internal value system to analyze how they see the world and use their value system over the values of other people or society. They have a strong knowledge of what they feel is right or wrong. If someone questions their advice or doesn’t trust their motivations, it can make them feel as if their natural decision-making process is being threatened and they may lash out. 

Feel free to comment below if you have any thoughts! 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Happy Love Week! 

Teal 

The Inferior Functions and Why We Should Develop Them (What Each Type Might Regret Not Paying Attention to When Making A Decision) 

Each MBTI type has an inferior function, which is the fourth function in the set of cognitive functions. For most people, the fourth function tends to become developed later in life, once all the others have been developed. When each type experiences grip stress, they tend to live in their fourth, inferior function in an unhealthy way. By working on, and developing the fourth function now, it can help each type not to overlook information they may later wish they had paid attention to. Here is a list of the inferior functions for each type, and one reason why each type may want to pay attention to their inferior function when making a decision. 

ESTJ/ENTJ: Introverted Feeling. An ESTJ or ENTJ may make a decision with their extroverted thinking function using facts and data, then later wish they had paid more attention to their own feelings and values while making their decision. They may pay more attention to facts acquired by external sources than they will about their own feelings about situations. For example, when making a decision about the best way to handle a mistake by a staff member at work, they may look only at the external facts and data and possibly make the person feel as if they overreacted negatively. They may forget to check in with how they feel about the situation internally themselves and how they would handle it if it were they themselves that had made the mistake. 

ISFP/INFP: Extroverted Thinking. An ISFP or INFP may make a decision with their introverted feeling function using past values imparted them by their families and the way they were raised, then later wish they had paid more attention to their external process of taking data and facts from the external environment. They may spend too much time in their own thoughts and values, forgetting that there are others facts they may want to consider. For example, they may respond to their partner or friends in anger, thinking that they have violated some value of belief they have based on their own past experiences. However, they may wish they had used their process of taking in the external facts and environment before jumping to conclusions, and realizing that the person may not have meant ill will. 

ESTP/ESFP: Introverted Intuition. An ESTP or ESFP may make a decision with their extroverted sensing function using sensory experiences and the present moment, then later wish they had paid more attention to their internal pattern collecting of information. They sometimes spend too much time in the present moment, without diving deep to pay attention to patterns that may help them make a decision. For example, they may decide it is a great idea to go sailing, and realizing later that they should have checked in with their internal intuition of pattern collecting, telling them that it was bit too windy for sailing that day. 

INTJ/INFJ: Extroverted Sensing. An INTJ or INFJ may make a decision with their introverted intuition function using patterns and data they process internally, then later wish they had paid more attention to their external process of paying attention to sensory experience and the present moment. They sometimes get stuck in needing to know the full picture, where their introverted intuition wants to collect ALL the data before making a decision, and sometimes, they will wish they paid more attention to making a decision in the present moment using external sensory environment cues. For example, they may decide not to go on a rafting trip with their friends because they were invited last minute, but looking back on it, wish they had just gone and enjoyed the present moment. 

ESFJ/ENFJ: Introverted Thinking. An ESFJ or ENFJ may make a decision with their extroverted feeling function paying attention to other people and their feelings, then later wish they had paid more attention to their internal fact collecting and data based on their experiences. They may spend a lot of time trying to figure out how their actions may make other people feel, and not enough time paying attention to data and facts they have collected themselves. For example, they may decide they will do a favor for a friend, only to realize later that they should have paid attention to their internal process of determining whether they had all the facts before agreeing because the task ended up being monotonous and boring for them. 

ISTP/INTP: Extroverted Feeling. An ISTP or INTP may make a decision with their introverted thinking function using their internal process of determining the facts, then later wish they had paid more attention to their others feelings and values while making their decision. Using their introverted thinking, they may realize they are right and shut someone down, and later wish they had paid attention to the other person’s feelings. For example, they may have had an experience and learned that red cars fade in the sun based on the fact that their red bike had previously faded in the sun, and insist that the other person not get a red car. They may later realize when they hurt the other persons feelings, that they may not care about the fading, they just wanted a red car. 

ENTP/ENFP: Introverted Sensing. An ENTP or ENFP may make a decision with their extroverted intuition function using data, patterns and theories (typically theories based in reality), then later wish they had paid more attention to sensory detail and their own past experiences. They may make a spontaneous conclusion based on someone else’s experience and assume details about it that may not actually be true based on their projection of reality. For example, if a person does not respond to a text right away, and the ENTP/ENFP would have responded quickly, they may assume the person is wishy washy and get angry. They may wish they had paid more attention to their internal fact collecting, and realize that maybe the person had something else going on. They may wish they had made sure to get all the facts before coming to a conclusion. 

ISTJ/ISFJ: Extroverted Intuition. An ISTJ or ISFJ may make a decision with their introverted sensing function using past experiences and sensory detail, then later wish they had paid more attention to their external process of taking in patterns, theories and data from the external environment. They take data internally and absorb it, and use their past experiences to make their decisions. For example, they may buy a brand name dress for the party based on their past experiences and sensory data collection, failing to realize that external trends have moved on and changed in the last six months and it is no longer in style. 

Feel free to comment below if you have other tips or thoughts! 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Tips for INFJs During the Holidays

INFJs can get burnt out during the holidays. As naturally quiet people, most INFJs tend to be empathetic and sensitive as well. This can cause people with the INFJ preference to get burnt out quite easily during the holidays, especially if they have large families and have many social obligations. 

As an INFJ myself, I enjoy the Christmas spirit and giving gifts. However, I moved to California, and I stay here during Christmas. It’s a self-care tactic, because the burnout conundrum for INFJs during the holidays is real. If you do have to be around a ton of family and navigate several social situations during the holidays, take a look at these tips: 

  • Find a place wherever you are that you can get a few seconds of silence and meditate there 
  • Bring a small notebook, if you find yourself in a group of people and getting drained, start thinking of your next creative project and make yourself some notes 
  • Read a book on your Kindle phone app 
  • Do a small yoga practice in the morning before leaving to go anywhere, or in your room if you are staying with family 
  • Tell people when you need a break; it doesn’t have to be confrontational 
  • Offer to help in the kitchen – it’s typically mindless and you can connect with people over where all the dishes go 
  • Find the pets! And give them a snuggle or scratch 
  • For gift giving: find a fun gift that is universal, and buy one for everyone on your list (this year we did Christmas colored hot chocolate bombs – so fun and we can give them to everyone!) 

Feel free to comment below if you have other tips for INFJs! 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Twilight Zoning

People are starting to go back into offices & kids are going back to school. The traffic has picked back up and is almost as bad as it “used to be”, before COVID-19 in March 2020 changed the world. People keep saying things like “when everything goes back to normal”. But when they go back to the office, and supposedly going back to normal, I have heard many say that it hasn’t felt the same as it once did. 

For one thing, the whole world realized that the majority of the work force could do everything they needed to remotely. And if they couldn’t, they were forced to figure out a solution to it. And they did. So many new ways of doing things were being innovated, that 2020 may well be the most creative time period in the history of the world. That creative energy permeated and sent creative energy vibes to everyone, everywhere in the world. There was collaboration and new friends were made, also all over the world. 

2021 hasn’t been quite that innovative. The creative energy that was expanding everyone’s minds in 2020 has been put into all the projects it needed to be put into. As a result, I feel the stagnant energy and boredom shining through. People are becoming restless and looking for the next “new” wave of energy. Everyone is thinking that going back to normal will solve this restless energy, but the truth is that it won’t. Because the situation will never be the same as it once was, and most importantly, YOU will never be the same as you once were. 

We were all forced to take a look at what wasn’t serving us in our lives by being isolated and learning to be so flexible with all the mandates and changes that each day held for us. All of us have shifted and changed for an entire year and a half, and expecting things to be exactly as they were when we left is almost like an episode of the Twilight Zone. A lot of things changed in 1.5 years and we can’t just decide that the way forward is to technically move backward. Or we can I guess, but that isn’t very productive. 

So, my question for you today is, what are you going to do? What is 2022 going to look like for you? Are you going to try and find a new project or way of living that suits the new you? Or are you happy to try to forget that the last 1.5 years even happened? Are you feeling that stagnant energy and boredom in your own life? What can you do to mitigate it? 

Email me if you want to chat: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

We Are All Human, and We All Have “Stuff”

I’ve been reminded again and again over the last few days how easy it is to disassociate from people we don’t know. It’s easy to think that people we don’t know don’t have any issues or pain, and on an even farther scale, that they are actually somehow evil or bad. The thing is, we are all human. We all go through this thing called life, and not a single person has it easy. We are all here to learn and grow and figure out what the meaning is for each of us. No one has the right to determine that for anyone else.  

So please, can we move forward with a little more compassion? Sometimes, it’s helpful to ask “what if” questions about every single person encountered: “What if someone they loved just died?” “What if they have been through a traumatic event recently or at any time in their life?” “What if they have crippling perfectionism or anxiety based on their less than perfect childhood?” Because chances are, even if not the questions asked, that something is true for them.

What if we move forward with curiosity about others instead of judgement? What if we choose love over fear? What if we remember that we aren’t the only person on earth who matters? 

I’ve even encountered people judging others for being too quiet, too lazy, making different decisions than themselves, or not having the same drive as themselves. Not everyone needs to be a carbon copy of each other. If we were, the world would be extremely boring. I’m reminded of the book The Giver by Lois Lowry. Let’s not inadvertently make this into that world. 

I’m not saying this should be a perfect practice. If we were perfect, we wouldn’t be human. Self-care still matters, your own voice still matters, your boundaries still matter. I was just hoping that maybe we could approach each other with a tiny bit less judgement. 

*Disclaimer: if someone is actually trying to harm you, you have every right to defend yourself & get out of the situation. 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

INFX Types and How the Remote Work Possibility Changed Everything

Introverted intuitive feelers (INFJ’s and INFP’s) in the Myer’s Briggs Type Indicator are commonly known as being quiet, sensitive and kind. When the COVID ‘19 pandemic hit back in early 2020 in the Unites States, many INFX types were forced to work completely remotely, possibly for the first time, and possibly permanently, because many companies realized they could save money on office space by having remote employees. 

This new remote working environment seemed to be a significant win for most people of these types, as they aren’t the majority of the population. INFJ’s make up about 1.5% of the population, and INFP’s make up 4.4%. This is shown by the following data with the spread of personality type distribution over the general population: Personality Type Distribution by Michael T Robinson. 

So, with a little under 6% representation of the population, many of these types day-to-day needs and preferences often and easily get overlooked, due to their quiet natures and desire to avoid conflict by speaking up about it. These types need quiet, alone time for processing and for rejuvenation of energy levels. Hopefully remote work will become more common even now that the pandemic is lifting because it is very beneficial for these sensitive personality types. While these types do enjoy collaboration and connection with others, and sometimes even working with others, they also need a lot more alone time than the average person. It would be great if a common reason for working remotely takes personality type into consideration, but we have a long way to go before this is commonly recognized in the world. Working one day per week in the office could even be an option, as this will allow these types to have a chance to connect with their teammates, but allow for greater concentration and less burn out if they are able to focus their energy from a place that greater supports their nervous system. 

Of course, there is the possibility that someone of this type may have less than ideal working from home conditions. In that case, special consideration should be made to allow this type of personality to have their own office, or own space, instead of forcing them to sit in a collaborative work space within the office. Just before the pandemic, the “open-office” plan had become extremely popular for companies and firms who prided themselves on collaboration and the “team approach” to problem solving. Here is an article about the history of this concept: History of Open Office Spaces by Alyse Kalish. 

While this is great for many types, and specifically the most common types in the United States, it is not great for INFX types. Introverted, intuitive, feelers need a lot of alone to process information they receive from the world, and having to constantly listen to others talking or even participating in conversations will not allow these types to be at their best for learning and processing information. Additionally, they are intuitive, which means that they relate to the world through intangible theorizing, which of course, happens in the mind. While the most common second letter type; sensing, uses the five senses to engage with the world, intuitives have to process things through the mind to fully understand and relate to others and problems that arise. Lastly, because they are feeling (the opposite letter being thinking), they are usually fairly emotionally sensitive. 

All of these traits together usually make INFX types very sensitive. They are sensitive to loud noises, smells, strong lights, and their energy is typically drained quite quickly with those types of sensory inputs. They can easily be prone to sensory overload, and when that happens, they are unable to process any new information. When we allow these types to either work from home, to have a private space in the office, they will thrive. By allowing them to thrive, companies are allowing their assets to be at their best and perform their best work. You wouldn’t run your brand-new Lexus for hours on end, not allowing it to take a break except for gas, and let people scratch it and let it sit out in the sun with its fresh coat of paint. So, companies shouldn’t let their employee assets burn out either. INFX types are typically very dedicated to what they do, and will likely be a wonderful asset for many companies if they are allowed to create their own space and take things at their own pace. 

Thank you, COVID-19, for teaching the world a very important lesson. When we all went remote, the INFX types started to shine. Their energy levels were repleted, and they were allowed to do things their way, which was a beautiful reminder that there are all different types of people in the world, and not everyone does or processes things the same way. It would be great if companies and firms could start adopting the Myers Briggs Type Indicator, NOT as a way to typecast or stereotype, but as a way to allow each individual to be their best, and create a work environment that really allows them, as an individual person, to shine. 

Let me know what you think! Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics.  Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Boundaries

I’ve learned a lot about boundaries in the last year. I think it’s important to write about them because not many people truly know what they are. Some people put up a wall, and decide that’s their boundary. Some people make impossible rules for their family members and close friends to follow. Some people yell and scream when someone else makes a mistake and call it a boundary. I am not saying all this to point a finger at anyone. I’ve just been observing for most of my life, and realized that most people, despite all the “boundary setting” self-care jargon that goes around, have absolutely no idea how set a meaningful and realistic boundary. Myself included, at least up until this point. 

Boundaries come from a place of deep love. Yes, they come from self-care, but they actually come from deep love of the other person/people as well. When we set boundaries, it is a realistic expectation, and it comes from a realistic state of being. For example, if I get tired after three hours of socializing, setting the boundary can be lovingly telling the person I am with that I must go home after three hours. Otherwise, I will be drained of all my energy. I will be tired the next day, and I will be resentful of them if I don’t let them know how I feel. Others aren’t mind-readers, and most others want you to be happy because they love you. If they don’t want you to be happy, then the relationship is worth re-thinking. I am by no means telling people to start cutting off relationships, but maybe take a look at where the disconnect lies. And yes, this requires a lot of self-reflection and self-inquiry, but it is worth it when you are able to find an energetic balance in life that works well for you. 

My more recent realization is that when setting a boundary, you are setting this boundary out of a love and consideration for the other person. If you are expecting them to read your mind, and then becoming resentful of them because they didn’t, you are the one not being considerate of them. This was hard for me to swallow (and still is) because I think of myself as a truly conscientious person, but I hate creating conflict. Setting boundaries is hard for me. But if I want to truly care for someone else, I must tell them when I am being pushed too hard. Easier said than done, and I am by no means an expert, or even close to being good at this yet. I think success and ease come over time and with practice, and I am just starting at the beginning. 

I hope this helps someone out there struggling with what boundaries mean to them. I am happy to have a dialogue if anyone has questions or wants to talk about it further. 

Email Me: infinitetealskies@gmail.com  

Website 

Human Metrics MBTI Free Test 

Additionally, I have a free gift offering! When you sign up for my newsletter on my website, you will receive a free PDF about MBTI Type Dynamics. Sign up here: Teal’s Newsletter 

Love, 

Teal 

Living in the Past or Future

I’ve been doing A Course in Miracles, and started in on lesson eight today. Most of these concepts are ones I already apply to most of my thoughts and everyday life, but they are great reminders to pay attention to that pesky narrative that your thinking mind tries to impose on you. Today’s lesson is to think about how your thoughts are actually past thoughts. What I am interpreting the book to mean is that everything your thinking mind can think of, is something you have already seen, done, or created a neural pathway for in your brain for. You can project the future (or I like to call it “future project”), but the projection will be limited to anything you have already known in the past because you can’t predict something you have never experienced before. 

As an INFJ, and using introverted intuition as my hero function, I naturally future project, so this lesson really resonates with me. It’s a great reminder to be here now, in the present, and the lesson mentions that this means that your mind should be a blank slate when you are actually in the present. If you are fully living in the present, you cannot be truly thinking of anything else. Additionally, the past isn’t the current moment and when thinking about the past, you aren’t actually visually seeing the past. So, what you are thinking about doesn’t currently exist. Therefore, the only way to live is in the present. 

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Love, 

Teal